Gendered Tears

The marrow of this bullshit is that public show of tears are usually only considered acceptable if it fits the status quo.

Men who cry over sappy films or physical hurt get their masculinity revoked, while it’s acceptable for women to do the same because of the stereotype of them being more ‘fragile’ and 'emotional’.

Men have to have a specific narrative built up when they cry over personal upset, which is highly damaging, but also because of how everything else is set up, people lean towards giving them the benefit of doubt and assign some form of stoic, valorous bottling up when they do. But this good faith isn’t afforded to women, especially if the tears are a response to something a man did, or a sign of upset over the status quo (sexism, fatphobia, ableism, etc.)

Crying because the status quo is being challenged against them is usually considered acceptable. See: politicians or celebrities crying in public because sexual abuse cases are “ruining” them, white women crying when they’re terrified of a non-white person or a non-cis person, etc.

I am now adding nuance everywhere now. Pushing against misogyny and sexism benefits EVERYONE and by gods I am going to start acting like it. A lot of bullshit is just in service of enforcing the status quo. Never ever let discussions about it degrade to polarization or pain olympics, especially now that we've seen how outrage bait can be used to recruit people into extremism.