Mistaking the bandage for the wound

“Mistaking the bandage for the wound” is a great description of that one social phenomenon.

Watching/listening to sad shit and venting isn’t a symptom of upset, it’s a sign that I’m dealing with it and no longer just white-knuckling through things. It means I have the time and space and energy for some unwinding and a community to be vulnerable with. And once I untangle this knot of emotions I can tackle shit again with renewed clarity and bolstered morale.

It seems to me the main reason this happens is that some people think showing signs of upset - or being upset at all - is some sort of moral failing. A “failure” state of sorts, the efforts to bounce back (or any effort to acknowledge ~negative~ emotions) eclipsed by the fact that you’ve “failed” in the first place. Which might be way there’s pearl-clutching over music and stories that aren’t bouncy happy ending kind of shit.